speaking the spanglish

Hanging out with Americans here in Madrid feels like cheating, since the real reason we all came to Madrid was to learn Spanish. And of course, when put together, we all speak in English. Well, to a careless bystander, it may sound like English. But, all of us know that we have infused our English with little Spanish ticks or slips into Spanish grammar. It's not something we do knowingly, but rather, with so much switching between the two systems, our mouths and brains slip into familiar patterns...in the wrong moments. The speaker of these ticks has no idea, however, until someone points out, "Do you know what you just said?" For example, Give me a lost call ("una llamada perdida"= a missed call). What's your direction? ("tu dirección"= your address). Yesternight, I didn't sleeped. ("anoche"= last night; and sleeped...I hadn't had coffee that day). For where do you go out in Madrid? (¿Por dónde sales en Madrid?=Where do you go out in Madrid?). These are the ones that come to recent memory, but I'm sure there are plenty more, both intentional and accidental. We'll go tapaearing, maybe grab some cañas and bocadillos if we still have hunger, y a ver, does anyone have the hour?

fun with arabic

If you've ever tried to learn a language, you're probably familiar with language podcasts. Who hasn't thought, I have a long commute in the subway/car/bus, and I can use this time in a productive way to better myself as a human being? So, you download some free podcasts, put them on your iPod, and begin to speak to yourself on the public transportation system. Depending on what language, this almost always guarantees you a certain amount of space (Arabic=the MOST space and the most nervous looks). Having a fair amount of experience with Spanish and French podcasts, I thought I knew what to expect when I downloaded some in Arabic. In varying levels of difficulty, the speakers would discuss daily situations like going to a restaurant or to the gym, and perhaps some current events that reflected a certain cultural aspect. I asked a friend who listens to a German podcast what the set up was like, and she told me there is always someone ordering beer. Work situation? Someone orders a beer. Discussion with a family member? That probably involves a beer, at least in German. You've gotta know your priorities. Well. I've been listening to these Arabic podcasts for some time, and I've gotta say, the situations are getting progressively more bizarre. It started out with a conversation about how one of the speakers was a fast eater and one was a slow eater. The next one was about a child asking for a piece (...of something) from his mother. The next one (and final one, that I have patience for), blows them all out of the water. Here is the transcript, no exagerations:
Title: Please Don't Praise Me

A: You are generous, good, and intelligent.
B: Please don't praise me, because I think that the devil will get inside my head and make me think that I'm better than other people.
A: Modest!

I understand that with Arabic, the different dialects make it a difficult language to teach, and it is inseparable, really, from political and emotional charged discussions/diatribes relating to Islam and relations between the Near East and West. I get that. However. How is that a beginner Arabic conversation?? What happened to counting? Can a girl get a podcast about ordering some food in a restaurant?