spanish breakfast

Let me be clear: "Spanish breakfast" is a nonsensical phrase, and a worse idea. What the Spanish eat in the morning should not be referred to as "breakfast," to preserve the dignity of what some say is the most important meal of the day. Also, I want it to be clear that I'm not hating on the Spanish, since their lunch is truly remarkable. I will take two plates of goodness 8 days a week, since in Europe, weeks are eight days long. However, their eating habits in the early hours truly leave something to be desired. Something edible, perhaps. For starters, I have watched my roommate prepare breakfast every morning. This is not typical Spanish, since typically, the Spanish don't eat breakfast, they just drink a coffee and get on with it. However, this "breakfast" consists of a large bowl of instant coffee, two pieces of bread (we don't have a toaster) with jelly, and cereal or muesli, which she puts in the bowl of coffee. Yes. You heard (read) me right. In the bowl of coffee. You should be shocked at 1) bowl of coffee, and 2) that I'm spending time writing this down. At first, I thought this was just my roommate, but I've heard other stories regarding bowls of instant coffee, with or without the added bonus of cereal. Or, if you take your coffee without cereal, you can always have these bland, cracker-cookies called Marias for breakfast. They come in whole-wheat, oreo-style, or cardboard-like. But, maybe the instant coffee is too hard to make. Maybe you go out for breakfast in the morning. In that case, instead of ordering an omelet or scrambled eggs, you can get toast with olive oil and tomato paste topped with ham. Actually, not that bad, once you've mourned the loss of anything resembling American breakfast. While Spanish coffee, or café con leche, is an achievement in itself, really, everything else that goes with it is somewhat subpar. This weekend, I got excited over Cheerios. Not regular Cheerios, but the kind with honey. Huzzah!