plant serial killer

I don't live with nudists anymore. I moved, and now live happily with two girls. Well, I live happily with two girls, and lots of dead plants. At one point, the plants were alive, but now, the majority are dead. I believe that my roommate loves plants, but just doesn't have that green thumb touch. Last week, she asked me if i thought this pot of moldy-looking soil with a twig in it was still alive. Uh...was this once a plant? But things have started to turn around, although suspiciously so. A couple days ago, my roommates were laughing in the living room, and I went to see what was going on. "Abi, look at this plant," one of them said. If you can imagine what a plant doing cocaine would look like, please do so now. This plant had its leaves pointed ridiculously upward, as if it's hair was standing on end after six shots of espresso. I thought this was a new plant, but no, this had been the withered brown plant-like organism just a few days before. I really couldn't believe it. I asked my roommate what she had done to incite this miraculous turnaround. "Mierda de penguinos." I'm sorry, come again? Did you just say penguin shit? Apparently, it had been quite an expensive buy at the supermarket. She showed me the bottle, because I'm a rational person and did at no moment believe that there could possibly be someone selling penguin poop as fertilizer. Collecting the excrement in such harsh climates seems like a fool's errand, and I mean, how would you even get the idea to procede with said plan, seeing as penguins live in desert climates with little plant life to fertilize? But right there on the label was a picture of a plant and a penguin, apparently in some kind of symbiotic relationship, brought to you by Carrefour Express. Further reading discovered that the poop was from Peruvian marine birds, but what does it matter? The morale of the story: penguin poop is crack for plants.